This...IS...Happening....!!!!

 As the weeks and days draw closer, I'm constantly reminded of how huge this is and how far we're going.  This band, recently, has really become a whole different world and reality. After recording, the atmosphere changed. It has started to feel like everyone is really coming together, our chemistry is solidifying and the way we work is more ornately cohesive. I'm a true believer of miracles, and even superstitious...I've always felt like in my life, if it's "meant to be," I experience a moment of magic.  So far, I've felt it happen in little ways with things that have been significant in my life. Again, it could just be my self-fulfilling prophesies in life due to my susperstition, but I like to believe in magic *_*
   Anyways, to be specific....today, practice was amazing.  Not to say it was perfect, because it wasn't. I made many, many mistakes...but the way it felt and the way we were at practice, it really convinced me that what's to come is really happening, and we're really able to do this.  Today, my guitarist shocked me. He truly is an amazing person full of surprises. The more his shell melts away and the more we learn about him, the more awesome he really becomes. In our second run through our set, he suggested a change in transitioning from songs and added in his own MC. He urged me to give more back-up and in our follow-up (my MC), he aided and then proceeded to sing back-up for me in the next song. O_O;   This is something I had suggested months ago, which he kind of shrugged off coldly with a blunt reply...so the fact that not only has he warmed up to us, but that he's now...really putting in what I never thought he would...I'm just breathless. I'd like to think that he believes in us now, that he wants us. It's always felt like he has been the farthest away and ready to bail if given reason enough..he's good enough to make it pro, so I've always been intimidated by him and scared of not being good enough for him. Recently, though, I'd like to think that he now considers us a real band, and if offered, he'd say he'd stay with Chronos. I want to believe this with everything in me...because today really was magic. I felt it. I felt what the stage might feel like, I heard what the audience might say, and I saw the lights and faces before me. I really believe now when I think back to when the leaders talking about "making the world of Chronos," I understand what they meant.  If every practice and the actual performance could feel like this...I'd be unstoppable. I finally got a taste of what it's like to "be on fire." I know I am a long, long way away from where I really want to be, but I can at least see the glimmer of what lies ahead.
   In other news....I have THE WORST cravings for milk products!!!! T_T I've had to cut them out of my diet completely in order to recover more from allergy-related issues. I know it's a sacrifice well-worth making when I want to do an amazing job for our show, but.....Oh, cheese....ice-cream....oreos...coffee....cheese....cheesecake....VanHouten's Iced Cocoa....yogurt.....I miss all ofthese things so much!!! I think I'm going to go overboard and go to a pizza buffet or something next month...>_< I can't believe how much my daily life and habits involved dairy. It's so sad...I now realize I do have an addiction. I just have to try hard to restrain myself for two more weeks...then I'll have myself a big beer and cheesecake!!! or...beer and pizza? err...something. ^_^ Until then, I'll just have to focus on the goal!